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Questions to ask your partner before the engagement

Not my traditional post, but I do think these questions are important to talk about before your engagement so you can come up with compromises as well as not have as many surprises in years down the line.

  • Do you want kids?

  • If so, how would you raise them?

  • How do you want to handle finances and bank accounts after we are married

  • Where do you see yourself in 5, 10, 15 + years?

  • Do you have or plan on having a 401k or other life savings plan

  • In case of an emergency or something happens to either of us, how will we move forward?

  • If one of us gets ill, what can we do to take care of one another

  • what are our needs? as a couple, and as individuals.

  • would you be willing to plan ahead with me?

  • would we benefit from a life plan and setting goals for ourselves as couples and individuals

Most importantly:

  • If our answers to any of these questions change, are we will to adapt together, or would it be a deal breaker?

Of course these are heavy questions, and I wouldn't recommend running down them like a laundry list, but they are just a few topics of conversation that may spark other questions as well. We also have to acknowledge that people change throughout the years, and answers to these questions may change, so we have to be willing to adapt to these changes together as a couple.

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